편안히 음슴체로 글을 쓰겟음..필자의 군시절 쌍말을 달리는 소대의 개썐 상병이 잇엇슴.근데 그상병이랑 필자는 같이 야간근무를 들어가게됫음.그 상병은 알량한 계급을 믿고  미친짓을 일삼는 또라이엿슴.소대 선임들이 불쌍하다고 함.. 줫댐...나는 생각함 나의 간사한 혀놀림으로 이녀석을 내것으로 만들기로함.내것이 되면 내군 생활은 ㅎㅎㅎㅎ드디어..시간이다가옴..새벽2시... 부랴부랴준비를해서 초소로 이동함..이놈이랑 근무를 처음 섯음.. 무슨말을 해야할까..뭐라고하면어쩌지..온갖 갈등과 두려움이 공존하는 가운데 그녀석이 차디찬 입을 열기시작함..상병:야 씨바..너 내가 존나 비밀 알으켜줌?나: 어떤것 말씀이십니까~?상병:아 씨바 이거 존나 비밀인데 말하면 뒤짐?ㅇㅋ?나:예 전 입에 백만근의 철근을 달고다니는 사람입니다.걱정안하셔도 됩니다..상병:아사실은....나...........드래곤이야.........나: 뭐지 이미친놈은....생각보다 훨씬 미친놈이다...드...드립을 쳐야해...이 드립의 성공이 나의 군생활을 결정짓는다...!!!!!!고민끝에 병신놈은 병신드립으로 맞상대해야겟다는 불굴의용기를 얻음 이 한수가 신의한수가 될지 패망의지름길로 인도할지 그떄까지 아무것도 몰랏슴.나:전..사실 드래곤`슬레이어`아이런 미친...시부랄...내가 왜이딴말을 한거지...지금생각해도 영문을알수가없음..내가그떈 미쳣나봄 차갑디 차가운 개드립으로 인해 약 5분의 정적이 흐름...나:....................상병:..................존나 내 인생 최고로 오래가는 5분...난 인생을 살면서 5분이라는 시간이 이렇게식은땀이 질질나고 숨이 턱턱막히는 시간인지 몰랏음.. 걍 줫댐..아 이 위기를 극복하기위해서는 새로운 전개를 시작할 이야기소재가 필요하다는생각을하게됨..  역시 남자하면 존슨얘기...존슨이 떠오름..이거다라는 생각에 존슨에대해 얘기를함..나:xxx상병님..제가사실 고백할게 하나잇습니다...상병:(차가운어조) 뭔데새끼야.나:사실 아까 샤워하실때 저도 모르게 xxx상병님의 우람하고 거친야성미의 존슨을..넋놓고 봐라보았습니다..상병:ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ병신새끼야 게이냐?내존슨을 왜쳐다바 별미친놈이다잇네 ㅋㅋㅋㅋ나:(난이떄부터 오유인인듯)   ..(병신새끼 나의존슨드립에 홀라당 넘어왓구만 끝장을내주지)나:(진지하게) xxx상병님의 존슨은 마치 신께서 직접 빚으신...신의 피조물이라고 밖에 할수없는..그런고귀한 형상을 가지고 계셧습니다..상병:ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ그..그래?나도 사실 내가 어디가서 꿀리지는 않다고생각해.나: 꿀리다뇨!!!!!!!!xxx상병님 혹시 북유럽 신화에 나오는 토르라는 신을 알고계십니까?상병:아씨바 그걸모르겟냐?토르금마 ..알어새꺄 ㅋㅋ나:토르에게는 묠니르라는 어마어마한 망치가 잇습니다.. xxx상병님의 존슨은 마치 묠니르의 형상을아니..그냥 묠니른줄 알앗습니다...           아연질색할뻔햇습니다.상병:ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ 너이 새끼 갑자기 맘에드네 ㅋㅋ근데 아연질색이뭐냐?나: 그냥..존나 멋있다는말입니다.상병:ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ그래?ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ   이떄까지 나에게 찾아올 충격과공포는 생각지도 못했었다..갑작스레 밑에서 들려온 웃음소리........난 뭔가싶어 밑을 쳐다봄..아씨바...순찰돌던 당직사관...아......이런미친..뚤린것임..군필자분들은 알것임...이공포를...난 다급히 수화를함..당직사관은 그냥 대따고함...우리초소로 한발짞한발짝 올라옴...식은땀이 존나 남..아..우리소대장임..걍 줫댐.........ㅜㅠ소대장: 아 ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ늬들 무슨말하는지 가만히 들어보니깐 아주 가관이구만.뭐?묠니르?ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ아 진짜 어이가없구나..헤이 거기 우리이병나:이병 박 x x 소대장: ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ아계속생각나네 야 너랑 xxx 이고요한밤 난동을 일으키고싶진않구나..그냥 낼 토요일인데 아침 9시에 보자 ㅂㅂ2 순찰끗나.xxx상병:...................;;;;;고..고생하십시요그렇게 xxx상병에게 개털리고 지옥같은 근무를 끝냄..잠도안옴 뜬눈으로 밤을 지새움..다음날 아침...소대장에게 찾아감 소대장:왓군...너희들 완전군장 싸고 다시 행정반으로 올수잇도록..나.xxx상병: (아 씨바ㅜㅜㅜ) 예 알겟습니다..아 그리고 박xx 넌 총들고오지마 나:(?...) 예 알겠습니다..그렇게 완전군장을 착용하고 행정반으로 옴.. 그런데.....소대장:어이 ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ내가 묠니르를 구해주고 싶었는데 군대에 그런게 어딧겟냐?그래서 이  오한마를 가지고 왓단다..이병은 총대신 이 오한마를 들고 연병장 10바퀴를돌고 온다 알겟나?나:(....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)아쒸빡!!!!!!!!!ㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜㅜ그렇게 나와 xxx상병은 연병장을 돔...아그런데 이 오한마가 생각보다 존나 무거움...존나 헥헥거리면서 연병장을 뜀..주말에 뭔미친놈들이 완전군장 매고 뻉뻉이 도는게 신기한지 사람들이 모여듬...군대사람1: ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ아시발 저거 바라 박토르다박토르 ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ필자의 성이 박 씨임..군대사람2:ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ지랄마 ㅋ저게뭔 박토르야  한마박이지.ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ군대사람3: ㅋㅋ한마박?한마박잌 어시발 ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ한마바키자나!!!!!!ㅋㅋ군대사람1.2.3.:ㅋ한마바키 아 씨발 ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ한마바키가 연병장을쳐도네 ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ그렇게...........나는 한마바키가 되었지그렇게.............나의 불행은 시작되었지..내이름은 한마바키........;