늦가을 바람에 어깨를 조금 떨어 툭 튀어나온 광대뼈를 손으로 훑어 친구도 잃었지 사랑도 잃었지 뭔 대학 꿈따위는 잠시 뒤로 미뤘지 시간은 처음부터 나를 기다리지 않았지 세상의 존재들을 모독하고 나 왜 이 모양일까 부모님을 원망하고 또 감사하고 또 원망하고 또 감사하고 또 원망하고 


내가 숨이 끊어졌을때 날 위해 울어줄 사 람 열 손가락도 채 안되는거 같애 순간의 위로가 담배와 술이라는게 멋지게 느껴졌다가도 참 엿같애 세상에 나 혼자라는 생각이 멤돌아서 소름끼치게 눈물겨워져 누가 날 잡아줬으면 해 어지럽네 나 지금 저 강물에 떠내려갈 것 같애